Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Compassion! Are you Listening?


I sat in the darkness after watching a program about people who had attempted suicide. I listened to their stories and one by one I got a sense that each person felt as though life wasn’t worth living. They had been trying to pursue their dream when suddenly they felt surrounded by loneliness which left them feeling rejected, abandoned and alone. Desperate to relieve the pain on the inside each had taken a step on the outside to end it all.

I am writing this with such passion because I perhaps like some of you have been to the point where mistakes compounded by circumstances caused me to think that perhaps life wasn’t worth the trouble. However before we dismiss people as weak let’s consider this, do we really have any idea of what has been arrayed against them? Personally I count as my friends those that have indeed fallen short by the accounts of others. After all isn’t that what Jesus did? Isn’t that who He hung on the cross for?

Experts say before people commit suicide they leave clues for the people around them. Today let’s look at the people in our lives, I mean really look at them. Then, go one-step further and listen as people share their inner most feelings. Or are you too busy thinking what you will say next? Listening is an art; it is forged with compassion and smothered with the balm of love.

Are you a parent who is too busy to really listen? Are you a husband or a wife who is over committed with less than no time to listen? Perhaps you are in a position of leadership and you use that as a form of power to put others down by criticizing. Could you be a Pastor who feels as though the sheep are too much to bother about? Perhaps you are a business owner who has no loyalty to meet the needs of your employees. You think they should be thankful just to work for you no matter how you treat them.

At the end of the day, and more to the point, at the end of life as we know it, we will be judged individually. My understanding is that we won’t be measured by how much we have accumulated, our position in life or the church, how many sermons we’ve preached, or how many books we’ve written. It will come down to how we treated the people that God brought across our path.

This next statement may come as a shock:

Some of our churches are the loneliest places on earth for anyone who doesn’t measure up to what is expected. It can also be the most critical place when people make mistakes. Instead of using our joy of salvation to lift others up we judge them. In some mistakes are seen as a weakness. Throughout history people who have achieved remarkable things have made countless mistakes along the way. The church on the other hand has little tolerance for mistakes. We talk about forgiveness but do we truly forgive? Or in our forgiveness do we just marginalize people? Have people become disposable? Far too many people enter the doors of our churches each week feeling broken and leave sadly the same way, afraid to share, lest they be judged. The sad part is this has become acceptable and often goes unnoticed week after week. Here’s a thought…

Would you have encouraged the following people to pursue their God given gifts, or would you have rejected them by both your actions and your words? Would you have called them friends or would they simply have failed too many times?

  • This woman was told in 1957 by Don Hewitt, who became the Executive Producer of 60 Minutes “to stay out of television.” Barbara Walters

  • His teachers said he was "too stupid to learn anything." He was fired from his first two jobs for being "non-productive." As an inventor, he made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, "How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?" he replied, "I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps." Thomas Edison

  • When the Bell Telephone company was struggling to get started, its owners offered all their rights to Western Union for $100,000. The offer was disdainfully rejected with the pronouncement, "What use could this company make of an electrical toy." Alexander Graham Bell

  • This woman had only seven poems published in her lifetime. Emily Dickinson

  • He is famous for his past home run record, but for decades he also held the record for strikeouts. He hit 714 home runs and struck out 1,330 times in his career (about which he said, "Every strike brings me closer to the next home run."). Babe Ruth

  • The main character of “I love Lucy” was once dismissed from drama school for being too quiet and shy. Lucille Ball

  • In 1954, Jimmy Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, fired this man after one performance. He simply told him, "You ain't goin' nowhere, son. You ought to go back to drivin' a truck." Elvis Presley

  • A Paris art dealer refused this man shelter when he asked if he could bring in his paintings from out of the rain. Pablo Picasso

  • 27 publishers rejected his first book, To Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street. Dr. Seuss

  • She submitted poems to editors for nearly 20 years before one was finally accepted. See "A rose is a rose." Gertrude Stein

  • Fired by a newspaper editor because "he lacked imagination and had no good ideas." He went bankrupt several times before he built Disneyland. In fact, the proposed park was rejected by the city of Anaheim. Walt Disney

  • Decca Records turned down a recording contract with this group with the unprophetic evaluation, "We don't like their sound. Groups of guitars are on their way out." After Decca rejected them, Columbia records followed suit. The Beatles

  • The author of Little Women was encouraged to find work as a servant by her family. Louisa May Alcott

Let’s have a heart of compassion for the mistakes of others. If you have never made a mistake in a certain area don’t be prideful and say that you would never do that. Instead be humble enough to understand that you have never been pressured in that arena. We simply don’t know what we would do until push comes to shove. God, on the other hand is not surprised by our mistakes, our missing it or our weaknesses. He already knows where when and how we will miss it and he has already forgiven us. Why then are we so outraged by people’s mistakes?

The church leaders of the day crucified Jesus on the cross and then mocked him, does that sound familiar?

I prefer people who are real. They have been downtrodden yet rise again for another day. They have been forgotten yet are making a difference in the shadows of life. They have been rejected but go about encouraging others so that they may never feel that pain. Everyday heroes are people who have been through the worst and yet give the best they have to offer to everyone else.

Our words are powerful. They can push people over the edge or they can lift people up to achieve greatness. Let’s use our words wisely.

Ask yourself: As far as people go, am I in the renovation business or in the demolition business? Am I a person who genuinely builds up or tears down? It is never to late for any of us to change!

Just think right now you could be encouraging the next…

Check more from Diane Broos at her website www.dynamicliving4u.com

3 comments:

Richard said...

My journey is so broken that I can never be a part of the crowd and the attitude you lament here. I have that advantage I think.

It seems to be that as often as not real power to change lives for the better emerges from the clouds of my my own misdeeds and misfortunes. This is easy for me to see for I am heavily laden with both.

Does it make sense that Edison's 1000 mistakes to inventing the light bulb were actually 1000 steps? No one would argue against him because the result of the journey was special.

How much more likely is it that my own 1000 mistakes were transformed into 1000 steps by the hand of a Master (Romans 8:28)? Isn't the question rendered rhetorical because the end result, being "perfected in Christ" is so valuable?

Dave Roberts said...

Thanks, mate... I was thinking today along similar lines, about how some churches are only interested in the spiritual aspect of persons and not the physical aspect - making them basically functional Gnostics... The whole person is important and appearances deceiving... The whole person needs to be encouraged, uplifted and built up... thank you for this :)

D.M. SOLIS said...

Dear Diane,

Wonderful post. I lost my life-partner four years ago. This post, your blog over all...they ring true. Again, thank you. Peace.